Follow @stuckinscared Stuck In Scared: ABOUT A MAN

Friday, 14 June 2013


Forty nine years ago, money was tight for The-Man. For months he, (after ensuring New-Wife had everything she needed to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table) religiously banked anything caught in the lining of his pockets at the end of each week; in the vain hope of owning a car. By the early months of 1965 he was finally in a position to purchase a cheap run-around.  
However, unbeknown to him, New-Wife was about to let him in on a little secret.

He returned home from work one evening (details of chosen car in hand), and was greeted by a beaming New-Wife; and the news that his hard earned savings had (that same day) been De-banked and... exchanged for a coach-built-pram! 
The mans initial reaction to the news that his first child was on the way was only very slightly marred by the realisation that the only four wheels he would be getting behind for the foreseeable future would be of the baby carrying variety.

Over the next few months his bank balance shrank as fast as his wife expanded, but he was happy, and two days after Christmas 1965 The-man could be observed running (no car remember) from hospital to home (a good few miles) excitedly passing on the news of his new baby girl to anyone whod listen.

The-man went on to have two more of his own daughters, and much later on in life acquired (on marrying his second wife) two step-daughters; who he would come to love as his own.
He would also go on to have a wide variety of cars.

The-man worked various jobs through the early years of his first marriage but finding little satisfaction in any of them, decided (during the 70s) to train as an ambulance man. He loved the job, and was good at it.
He later went on to qualify as a fast response paramedic.

Through the years he treated a lot of people and saved many lives; those he was unable to save he treated (until last breath or handover) with gentle care, reassurance, and compassion.

Over the years, The-man dealt with - attempted suicide, actual suicide, births, deaths, aggressive-drunks, car crashes, near misses, house fires; and a variety of other incidents.

He was first on scene to a guy with extensive and life threatening injuries, who was trapped in a mangled heap of once-was-car!
His own fear was well masked as, with soothing tone and reassuring words, he placed an oxygen mask over the guys face.
He was (after realising that the patients lung was compromised) inwardly horrified and incredibly stressed. Outwardly, he was (as always) calm and quick to respond.
With perspiration running down his neck and adrenaline working overtime The-man (with an award winning impression of calm) explained to his patient that he needed to insert a cannula and syringe directly into his lung.
Despite working in unsterile conditions, and having only ever performed this procedure once before (on a dummy in training class) he then got on with the job in (shaky) hand.
It was not entirely clear as the drivers skin began to pink up which of them was most relieved!

The-man was a devoted son; nursing his mother through the last years of her life with humility and patience, and (despite a childhood damaged by drunken rages and random beatings ) his father was afforded the same humility and patience when he needed it.

Shortly after the birth of his disabled Granddaughter in October 2005 The-Man flew home from holiday at a moments notice on receiving this text message - “Come home Dad, please come home Dad, I need you.”  
He left his second wife in Spain and jumped on a plane, just like that.

Did he know that (despite her being already surrounded by more family than the special care baby unit could handle) his child, (above ALL others) just wanted her dad? Did her reasons for not being able to cope without him for just a short while longer matter?
Of-course not; She needed him, he came... simple as that!

‘The man’ has been a loving husband; to both first and second wife. He continues to love and support the first, and adored (beyond words) the second; until 'death did them part'.

To his Grandchildren, he’s all the things the word ‘Granddad’ brings to mind. They love him to bits and he them.

To the thousands of men, women and children who were lucky enough to find him on board the ambulance that came in their hour of need; he was a hero. 

To his kids, he’s a big old softy whose eyes read ‘I love you’ whenever he looks at them; slow to anger,  quick to forgive. 
Always there (and if he’s not there he’s getting there!)  

'THE MAN' IS MY DAD.       I love you dad x  


'The man', on the beach; bare burnt chest - white legs - faded shorts - longish socks and high shine polished shoes. 
A snap shot in my mind that still makes me smile, though I can assure you, Teenage-me was not impressed (cringe) not cool dad, not cool at all!  o_O 


Thank you for allowing me to share

God bless you and all those you love  

Kimmie x 

Other 'Dad' related posts The Man has Cancer  >>  It's your birthday and I'll cry if I want to

"When God was handing out Dads... He saved the best for me." Quote


  1. You paint a lovely picture here of a truly special man. What a beautiful tribute to your father, Kimmie! No doubt he'll be delighted to be celebrated in words by his "child above all others". A great and very personal gift for Father's Day that reveals his daughter's storytelling skills. Blessings :)xx

  2. Thank you Joy.

    He has his own personal copy :o)
    Bless you for reading, sharing and taking the time to connect with me here.

    Means a lot

    God bless you and yours

    Kimmie x

  3. Farewell to the Soldier

    This poem is written in acknowledgement to all those unsung troopers who struggle to make headway in a hard world. They often suffer through grave misunderstandings of their condition and the battles they have to fight.

    Farewell to the Soldier

    Farewell to the soldier

    In that solitary field

    No flag to wave

    One last blunt axe to wield

    The noise of ragged battles

    Scream like ghosts in his head

    No sign of relief or final salute

    Drifting slowly away internally bled

    No last post in the field of cold night

    A feint slow drum a silent hollow beat

    Too tired to dream of victorious salute

    Just one last wish a warm sleep sweet

  4. Kimmie, thank you for recycling this wonderful tribute to your Father. He sounds like a fantastic man, full of warmth, compassion and integrity. You must be so proud of him and he of you for the lovely daughter you turned out to be.

    I must read all your blogs from the beginning. It's always a pleasure reading anything you write. xx

  5. That is a fine post Kimmie, and I am honoured that you included 'Farewell to the Soldier' as a poignant partner to unsung hero's.

    1. Thanks Ropey - I too am honored - that you thought my humble *bloggy abode* a worthy spot to share in - 'Farewell to the soldier' is a beautiful piece! :) x

  6. Touching and beautiful. I think you were lucky to have such a dad, and he was lucky to have a daughter who (rightly) held him in such high esteem.

    1. Thank you, I do feel incredibly lucky :)

  7. Absolutely beautiful. One thing in particular struck me, and that is how much you know about him - I feel that I never got to know as much about either of my parents and now it's too late xx

    1. Thank you.

      Yes, my Dad and I are very close & I do know a lot about him, he's often told me the 'car/pram' story, and the, 'happy sprint home after my birth' story - as for his life as an ambulance man - some details he's relayed verbally over the years, and some he wrote about in a book some years ago, sadly, the book never made it as far as the book shops, but I've read it myself many times :)

      Thanks for reading, and for taking the time to connect with me here

      God bless you and yours

      Kimmie x

    2. I'm sorry hun, I meant to add my condolences - it must be very hard to have lost both parents, especially if you feel that things were left unasked/unsaid.

      I can relate, in a way, because despite knowing an awful lot about my Dad, I do have things that I should have said/asked years ago (relating to my difficult relationship with my mum) and now that he is so ill, dying, I know I can't ever have that conversation - It would hurt him too much.

      Take care, Kimmie x

  8. Replies
    1. The most beautiful soul, he was H... he really was x