If the Tables were Turned... (a #1000speak Post)

If I were sat on concrete throughout the day, curled cold in a doorway at night. If stone were my pillow, cardboard my sheet, and my blanket fell from the sky. 

If I were hungry, huddled, cold, exposed; afraid of an unsheltered night. If I'd found a hideaway, been discovered, moved on; had nowhere else to go. 

If I knew what it was to hunt butts on the floor, scavenge food from a bin. beg handouts from passers by. If I was hungry, thirsty, drained; tortured by bellies cry.

If my gloves were wet from shifting snow, my fingers froze to biting. If my feet were screaming, barely shod, my skin icebound in tattered clothing. 

If I had to look down, was too ashamed to look up, was afraid of the look in their eyes. If I knew what it was to be guessed at, frowned upon, judged in a moment. 

If the tables were turned. If I were Homeless. I'd wish for (pray for) compassion. 

Poem by Cliff Letts. Read more Here

***

If my life had been torn apart by conflict. If I knew what it was to watch friends and loved ones die. Torn apart, blown apart, tortured. 

If I'd been forced to leave my home, community, country. Leave a life time of people behind.

If my life, my children's lives depended on running, if there was little hope in the running but running was all we had. 

If I'd had to bundle up belongings, a whisper of our all. Drag my babies through the night, throw them onto an uncertain boat... answer their cries with lies and maybes. 

If I (we) survived the journey. Were thrown (traumatized) from a sea of hope into an unfamiliar (largely unwelcoming) world.  Washed up, weary worn, stranded! 

If my children now wandered barefoot in the rain, in the-there-that-we-had-run-to... rejected, hungry, hurting.

If I'd arrived at hope to find hopeless, and would rather we'd died in the there that we'd fled... than die in the there that we'd run to.   .

If the tables were turned. If I were a Refugee. I'd wish for (pray for) compassion. 

***

If I were old, lonely, unwanted, forgotten. Old; forgetful, childlike, demanding. Old; frustrated, sharp tongued, aggressive. If I were hard work...a burden.

If I'd been Marie; unloved, abused. Surrounded by hopelessness; voiceless. confused. If I'd known fear without comprehension. If my screams had gone unheard. 

If I were alone; scared, unprotected. Nothing-to-no-one; wretched, neglected. If I were they that are!

If the tables were turned. 

*** 

This is a #1000speak post. Thankfully, there are a lot of kind, compassionate people in the world. People who make a difference. People who give what they can, do what they can, bring hope to the hopeless.  Not least the folks who write for 1000-Speak.

1000-Voices-For-Compassion is such a beautiful movement. There are so many contributions, from bloggers all over the World.... I encourage you to check them out if you get a chance, I'm sure you'll find some that resonate with you. 

You can do that by following @1000speak on Twitter or by checking out the '1000 Voices for Compassion' Face book page Here

#1000SPEAK FOR COMPASSION 

Speaking for GOOD on the 20th of every month

***

Thank you for allowing me to share

God bless you and all those you love 

Kimmie x

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Poem... That Cam-I-Am

That ‘Cam-I-am’ 

That ‘Cam-I-am’ 

I do not like that ‘Cam-I-am’

I do not like him here or there  

I do not like him anywhere

I do not like him on my telly

smoke-screen grin... state funded belly

I do not like him in my head

invading dreams when I'm in bed

I do not like his policies

his attitude to those in need

I do not like his spare room charge

homes (he says), are far too large

while he and his, and them and theirs

homes (state funded), rooms to spare

looking down on me and mine

and you and yours, and yours and theirs!

You homeless poor man....? 

'Cam' don’t care!

That ‘Cam-I-am' 

That ‘Cam-I-am’ 

I do not like that ‘Cam-I-am

Not in my head, not here or there

I do not like him anywhere

I do not like his common(s) trough

piggy chums, (state funded) scoff

I do not like his welfare war

feed the rich, starve the poor

His food-bank-Britain... Eton mess

Cameron - Osborne - IDS

“Scrounger, skiver,  feckless slob”

“sick, disabled? - GET A JOB!” 

PIP PIP (pardon the pun), state funded wine

looking down on me and mine

and you and yours, and yours and theirs

You hungry poor man...?

'Cam' don’t care!

That ‘Cam-I-am’ 

That ‘Cam-I-am’ 

I do not like that 'Cam-I-am'. 

Copyright©2015kimmie All Rights Reserved

Thank you for allowing me to share 

God bless you, and all those you love 

Kimmie x 

***

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Do I want to get rid of Cameron? - Hell Yes!

Remembering the Thatcher years, I was horrified when, in may 2010, David Cameron (enabled by Nick 'sorry-not-sorry' Clegg) slipped into power, along with the likes of George 'go-figure' Osborne, and Ian 'don't-give-a-damn' Smith.

Now, after five years of Cameron and co, the rich are richer and the poor are poorer, well, I expected that!
I knew the Tories wouldn't have any interest in, or feeling for, the 'common' people.... but (and this is a big BUT!) I never expected them to hurt people like me, or my daughter!

Why? - What might exclude us (and others like us) from Tory 'wickedness'?

Well, my child and I are both disabled - they wouldn't go after disabled people, would they?

****

Over the past five years the coalition (Tory) Governments draconian cuts, cruel assessments, and relentless propaganda have pushed (many) sick, disabled, and mentally ill people worryingly close to the edge - pushed some (largely unreported by the media) 'too far!'

My daughter and I didn't choose disability, she certainly didn't; she was born disabled. There's not a lot we can do to change our 'scrounger' status, either we take the 'handouts' (social security) from the same pot my husband paid into for years I might add, or we starve!

Of course, my 'Littlie' (going on 10, with a mental age of 5) has no idea that (Thanks to Tory/media rhetoric) our family would be judged negatively (by some) she has no idea that Cameron and Co have attempted to create a Britain that may not welcome the disabled adult she will one day become.

I know though! I know, and I am afraid, afraid for myself, afraid for my disabled friends, afraid for all (reliant) disabled people living in Britain.... but above all else, afraid for my child!

Many disabled people have had their lives turned upside down over the past five years - some have not survived the onslaught.

Vulnerable people, who (and I should know) are desperately afraid - deeply affected by right wing 'scrounger' propaganda, and increasingly concerned about their future.

People who's symptoms of illness/disability (in many cases, including my own) have been greatly exacerbated by an overwhelming fear of the next WCA (Work capability Assessment)
An assessment interrogation that often ignores their own doctors opinion in a deliberate attempt to strip them of benefits.

Mentally ill people who are terrified by even the idea of having to expose themselves (face to face) at a ten minute (tick box) assessment (to a complete stranger) who is unlikely to be qualified to assess Mental Illness, and even less likely to empathise.

People who are despairingly aware, that even if they are lucky enough to pass the assessment, it won't be long before the process begins again.

Many are self-harming, some feel/or have felt that suicide may be a better option than continuing to battle both debilitating mental illness/disability, and the 'powers that be'.

As most of you know (physical disabilities aside) my own symptoms of Mental Illness interfere with my ability to cope with many everyday activities without the support of my husband, and those things I do manage alone, are only doable if he's nearby.
I could give for instances but we'd be here all day; so I won't.

Most significantly, for the purpose of this post, is that my disabilities prevent me from working, and also from caring for my disabled child alone....and, as I'm unable to function at home, or outdoors without support, it also prevents my husband from working.

Although, given that I care for my disabled child (to the best of my abilities) with hubby's help, and he cares for us both (full time) with no help, I'd ask those who see fit to judge us (with all due respect, Mr Cameron) to define *hard working people*.

I'm terrified of the benefits system, I fear the dreaded brown envelope (DWP letter) every day - the sound of the post man fiddling with the letter box puts me on edge before anything hits the mat - the site of any brown envelope on the hall floor puts me in a state of panic, which continues to have a negative affect on me long after hubs has checked the contents, and reassured me that today is not the day that I will have to begin AGAIN the process of proving how disabled I am!

It's a daily, overwhelming fear....I have no idea when the next letter will come, but one thing is certain - It will come!

If, after that next assessment, the powers that be decide that we are no longer (in their opinion) entitled to support, I will STILL be disabled, my daughter will STILL be disabled, and my husband will STILL be a full time carer. The ONLY difference (other than making us sicker) such a decision would make; is that we would have nothing to live on!

We're less than a week away from General Election 2015 (time of writing) and I'm terrified the Tory's might manage to 'lie' their way in for another term, because, dear reader, if they do; they will be coming for me and mine, and quite possibly (if you are reliant, or become so) you and yours too, and there won't be a damn thing we can do about it!

Thank you for allowing me to share

GOD bless you and all those you love

Kimmie x                                                     Copyright©2012kimmie All Rights Reserved

NB: The above thoughts, observations, opinions, are based on my own experiences, and those of disabled people I know, or who's experiences I have read about. I do not presume to speak for all disabled people.

POSITIVE THOUGHT

PRAYER

LORD, I pray for all sick and disabled people who have died, and for all who mourn them. Amen

Related posts:
I do not like that Cam-I-am
A Fine Line

Mental Illness #Quote

"People assume you aren’t sick 

unless they see the sickness on your skin

like scars forming a map of all the ways you’re hurting.

My heart is a prison of have you tried?s

Have you tried exercising? Have you tried eating better

Have you tried not being sad, not being sick?

Have you tried being more like me?

 Have you tried shutting up?

Yes, I have tried. Yes, I am still trying, 

and yes, I am still sick.

Sometimes monsters are invisible, and 

sometimes demons attack you from the inside. 

Just because you cannot see the claws and the teeth 

does not mean they aren’t ripping through me. 

Pain does not need to be seen to be felt.

Telling me there is no problem 

won’t solve the problem.

This is not how miracles are born. 

This is not how sickness works.” 

credit ― Emm Roy, The First Step 

Reblogged from 'The Grumbling Gargoyle'.. Behind Closed Doors...

The Grumbling Gargoyle: Behind Closed Doors...: Some of the brave performers

Over the last few weeks, I have been humongously privileged enough to be part of a project, Stand Up To Stigma, funded by Time To Change and delivered by The Comedy Trust, whose aims endeavour to tackle the problem of mental health discrimination....

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My Name Is 'STIGMA'

Within hours of meeting (in the virtual sense) the young lady I want to share with you today this is what I saw - A beautiful, vibrant, fun loving young lady who appears to live life to the full. 
Her eyes light up when she smiles (she smiles a lot) she goes out with friends, looks stunning in a little black dress and she loves her family.

I was able to determine all of the above just by looking at some photo’s that ‘Emelie Crecco’ had shared on Facebook.

I was NOT able to determine on sight alone that the beautiful (healthy looking) young woman I was looking at (stalking for the purpose of this post) has a serious and potentially life threatening genetic condition.   

I should clarify here that I was aware of Emelie’s disability before I saw her pictures (I’m not in the habit of randomly stalking and writing about strangers) my point is - I know Emelie is disabled because (and only because) ‘SHE TOLD ME’ initially (indirectly) via her Facebook status and then later face to face (screen to screen would be more accurate) in more detail via email.

Before I get to my reason for this post I’d like to briefly explain how CF affects Emelie.  

Emelie was born with cystic Fibrosis (CF) – now twenty years old she lives (behind the smile) with the knowledge that the average life expectancy for a person with CF is 38yrs.

Emelie’s condition is serious, causes a range of debilitating symptoms and is incurable.

She has a compromised immune system and needs to avoid where possible others who are sick. – Even a common cold might easily escalate into a full blown (possibly life threatening) lung infection.

Her body produces thick, sticky mucus which clogs up her lungs and pancreas, daily (multiple) inhaled treatments and other meds alongside extensive physiotherapy are essential to her well being.

She has more check - ups with the doctor than most people have hot dinners and is frequently too sick to do any of the things I observed her doing in her photo’s.

In addition to the symptoms outlined above Emelie’s body can rapidly become depleted of salts especially when the weather is hot causing at best chronic fatigue - weakness and at worst fever - muscle cramps - stomach pain – vomiting - dehydration and even heatstroke!

This brings me nicely (or not so nicely as the case may be) to my reason for this post……

On the 17/6/13 (an extremely hot day) Emelie had some errands to run around her town, she wasn’t having a particularly good day, she was finding breathing a little harder than usual and struggling with the heat so decided on this occasion to take advantage of her ‘handicap sticker’ (better known here in the UK as a disability badge – Emelie is American)

Despite being disabled herself and quite within her rights to use her badge every time she’s out (contrary to popular belief they’re not handed out without good reason) ‘Emelie’ chooses only to use this *passport to manageable walks* on bad days preferring where possible to leave disability spaces free for other disabled people!  

Anyway she parked up in a disabled bay, displayed her badge and went off to see to her errands. I imagine (though I wasn’t there so could be wrong) that she was probably wearing her *every-days a gift smile* as she went.

Unbeknown to Emelie as she *puffed* herself away from her car and down the street she was being observed! 

When Emelie returned (flagging a bit with the heat) to her car she found a scribbled note stuck on the window.

It read…. Shame on you, you are NOT handicapped – you have taken a space that could have been used by an actually handicapped person – You are a very selfish young lady. 

In the time it had taken Emelie to park up, display her disability badge and leave her car not only had *Mr/Mrs Stigma* decided they knew enough about her to judge her as a liar, a cheat *A selfish Young Lady* but they had publicly branded her as such too!   

They hadn't approached her, asked her why she was parked in a disabled bay (Though in my opinion she would have been quite within her rights to tell them to bugger off and mind their own business) instead they had (in their ignorance) on sight alone (mis) judged her! 

Their cowardly scribble might just have well have read - 'My name is 'STIGMA' and I am judging YOU'! 

Emilie’s initial reaction was anger (I believe livid is the word she used) and who could blame her!? However it wasn’t too long before her own feelings were replaced with concern for other sufferers and this led her to think about how her experiences that day might (through sharing) help raise awareness as to the severity of Cystic Fibrosis while at the same time opening people’s minds to the fact that not all disabilities are visible.

There has been a huge, (sympathetic) response to Emelie’s story so far and if you would like to support her awareness campaign yourself you can contact her either via Facebook >> Facebook.com/TeamEmelie or Twitter >> Emelie Crecco ‏ @emmcrecc I’m sure she’d love to hear from you.  

POSITIVE THOUGHT

I think it’s appropriate to take my lead from Emelie on this ‘positive thought’ occasion so in her words >> “Sometimes, people are fighting a battle that you can't see. Stay educated everyone. Be kind to people” ~~ Emelie Crecco ♥   

PRAYER

Lord, I pray that the eyes of those who *see it how it isn’t* be opened and the voices of those who *Tell it how it is* be heard.  Amen.

Thank you as always my friends for allowing me to share

God bless you and all those you love

Kimmie x